A different kind of enemy, A special breed of man, Fortunate, a demi-god, The "son-of-the-right-hand". Alone when he has partners, Sad when full of glee, Wishful when it's over, Lost in his T.V. As his body deteriorates, And all his hopes are dead, A single tear falls to the page And slowly turns to red. -Nov. 2012, Ben Jackson
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My head is aching something fierce, and I can't fall asleep... again.
Brain, brain, go away, you can think another day. Let me rest, oh let me be, You're causing problems, Can't you see?
Wake
An eye inside, cry inside, Turns to a shout, Scream inside, dream inside... It all comes out. Spilling blood, thick as mud, Clots on the snow, Thinner skin, torn again, Stitching the flow. Creatures chew, bite at you, Gnaw at the brain. Spitting, too,
tearing through Nothing but pain. A sickening is quickening, A lifetime it will last. Blood begins trickling Out of the past. Moving stone, feel alone, Empty my head. Broken bone, end be shown, Better off DEAD.
Arianna
Arianna, I just wanna Kiss and hug you more. Love you, Sure as the sky's above you, From skin down to the core.
Truth and Consequences
Up towards the heavens, Growing out of the eye, A flower of vision
Looking up to the sky. Blocked only by logic, By an egotistical being,
Reasoning and science Causing sight without seeing.
Faith builds it stronger, So look past your thought, Beyond useless books From which limits are taught. The soul is a life form That grows
from what's true. So ignore worldly thoughts, The Lord needs it from you
Elijah
I'm smiling through tears, And missing the years That we will never
share. The moments of joy To be spent with my boy To which none can
compare. My child, oh, my son, You'd nearly be one,
And the differences are vast. It's hard to believe, To even conceive That you'll only be the past. I hold a large part Of my broken heart Specifically just for you. And although we won't meet, The memories are sweet, And you know this is true. You're always with me,
And this you can see, My love for you is so great. You're waiting with love, High up above, It's so hard for me to wait. A moment draws nigh, For which you and I Will join in a total embrace. And hard as it may be, I cannot wait to see The beauty upon your face.
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He felt the dislocation, Knew of the separation, Even before it
arrived, But no time for preparation. Was any of it reality? This idiotic banality? He's surprised he's survived, A world full of venality. His ability to accept Reasons that he wept, Was tested to the brink, And is why he hasn't slept. But he'll stand more willing While his heart begins filling, And never again will he sink To evil thoughts of killing. Now he's almost ready, His thoughts like confetti, Scattered with a beauty, As it no longer seems petty. His eyes open completely, Looking more discretely, At what he knows is his duty, Sure this will end so sweetly.
Cannot Describe
I know no tribulation And feel no fear, I stand ready for anything When I have you near. We'll take on the universe, We'll tear through it all, No prison will hold us, We'll walk through walls. I'll challenge the world... Just bring it all on! We'll survive even when The air has all gone. When the sun extinguishes, And no water to see, No ground left below, There's just you and me. Worlds will rebuild Simply out of our love, God is the foundation Shining down from above. You and I are the basis For which all can create. My feelings for you, Are just way too great. My love is unbreakable Shatterproof, I can say, With a kiss from my lips, We'll create night and day. Love; not more than a word, For it cannot explain, The amount of perfection, so intense, it's insane. I will be your protector, Your lover, your friend, Your unbreakable chain, Your beginning and end. Every moment that passes, My heart overflows, My love could freeze fire And melt all the snows. Together we're everything, So take hold of my hand. When the world lays down, You and I will still stand.
Been Jack, Son?
Heavier than a ton of steel, More weight than solid gold, I try to lift it to the stars, but The ground tightens it's hold. The endlessly powerful pull Of gravity, upon my heart, Has made obvious to myself That it's tearing me apart. The invisible seams of limbs, The twine, the fleshy thread, That which is connecting, The torso to neck and head, Is unraveling and tearing, And just coming so undone, That soon I'll be in pieces, And gravity will have won. Horses and nobles alike, As in Humpty's great demise, Will not rebuild my being, But with little to no surprise. Because I am a living puzzle, A conundrum with a heart, An endless maze of emotion, How would they even start? Psychoanalyze my innards? You'd be confused lots more. Even I don't understand the Questions on that shore. So ponder all you'd like, and Any ideas you get: take note, But they'll only go in circles, Like sharks at a sinking boat. Because where reality ends, My inner-thoughts begin, What you call hallucinations Is just what makes up Ben. Scary, though it might be, This unmapped mental fire, Where I live my day-to-day Is a beautiful quagmire. So join your hands with mine As we fly into this disarray, It's time to see the dark side, I'm sure you'll be okay.....
Mister Malice
Mister Malice, what is it? You're sinking in the sand! The trees seem much taller, Just let me see your hand... We'll peel back
fingernails, Snap metacarpals in two, Puzzles of bone fragments, So we can rebuild you.... Mister Malice, open up now, Thoughts like melted glass, Medulla oblongata burning As dreams all slowly pass. Let me see the other hand, We'll bend the fingers back, Pushing down upon the wrist 'Til
you feel a blinding crack. Mister Malice, handless now, Time for you to get a grip, Hand off the responsibility, Burn off the fingertip. You no longer have identity, You're a ghost with no hand. Time to begin the ending, Time to rise out of the sand.
Mister Malice Two
With both hands broken, They'll heal deformed, Both pain and
pleasure Swooped in and swarmed. Mental instability, Grinning, rage-filled eyes, The direction of the anger Is almost always a
surprise. Should he be befriended? Should he be an enemy? Can he even be trusted? Is the outcome plain to see? Oh, Malice, what's it now? A contract in your mind? Reason has clearly left you And is very far behind. Hired as a killer, Paid to deal death, Attracted to the murder Like an addict is to meth. His speed is quite ferocious, His method, messy, cruel. Cross him, if you dare, But you'd surely be a fool, For the end never changes, The finish always the same, To you, this is your life, but To him? Merely a game...
Lou Knee 2ne
Alter ego, make an incision, Cut down to the bone, Both of us make the decision Before we had been shown. Shown what, you've asked, What's unveiled to you two? You've both been unmasked And can see right through. Our quest is quite
obvious, Our outcome, very clear, You cannot take this from us And cannot hide it in here. The light from grey matter, Nay, from deeper within, Will cloud up with a splatter, And comes out once again. Can you really understand? Can you even comprehend? Your ideas are so bland, Say hello to my new friend. Killer, hired thug, a goon, Each and all and more. A twisted face like a cartoon, Blood surely now will pour. Looney like a psychopath, Schizophrenic, insomniac, Add more crazy, do the math A newer breed of maniac. Scarier than anything, ever, More frightening than death. Smarter, wittier, more clever, A style dirtier than meth. Lou, you crazy son of a bitch, You're a loaded fucking gun. Insane is on, hit the switch, It's time to have some fun.
Great to Relate
The words of the Stones Time is on my side My eyes are now open I've realized they lied The more minutes pass The hours that tick by The days, weeks, months Bring a wish that I'd die The endlessly mesmerizing Psychotically built Plants of true happiness Have started to wilt A connection, an attraction A pause in the action Again follows the Stones I can't get no satisfaction So I'll wait even longer And play in this game Pleased to meet you Won't you guess my name?
A to Three in One Bee Sea
I get lost inside my thoughts, A labyrinth of crazy dreams, Bruising by psychotic shots, Syringes filled with screams. Doctor, where's my 'script? I'm in dire need to numb... My sanity has fully slipped, Chewed up just like gum. In a room that's built for one In a bed that's built for two, Three inside my head is fun, Over the cuckoo's nest I flew. The first is simply just me, The one that you first meet. The first part of personality, The beginning of the street. The second is a darker one, A sicko; perverted and cruel. His psychosis weighs a ton, He's also known to drool. The third, a scary aftermath, A collection of
things to fear. He ends it all in a bloodbath, Destroys what you hold dear. There you have it, all of me, A group of infinite insanity, The ride continues to the sea And ends in bloody calamity.
Dense Fog
Awaken in the middle Of a dense, frightening mist; Unaware of what's out there, Death is lightly kissed. Reaching hands out blindly, Trying to find direction; Pulling in some hope again, Instead finding infection. The heat of a thousand suns, The chill of an icy end; It's confusing to be losing What's just around the bend. Eyes opened or shut tight, Is it daytime or is it night, When wrong turns into right, It's unnecessary for the light. The fog slowly dissipates, Lifts up high and disappears, Atop the ground, I am found, The mist taking all my fears. I'm waiting there for you, Fearless, stronger than ever, I'm finally free, to be me, But that damn fog... ... it sure is clever...
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Walking silent, steady flow, Afraid to ask your name, A partner, who we all know, And don't know all the same. A thousand different labels, Countless, infinite looks, Personified in several fables, Written about in ALL books. Although I wish you gone, You're always by my side, I turn to ask you something, And you have run to hide. Never there when wanted, Everywhere when you're not, Family that you've haunted, And there is no second shot. You're my very hated enemy Whom I loath with my tears, You ruin all our encounters, But take away most fears. When you take my hand, And actually say my name, I'll say, "I know you, Death, And don't know you..."
"...all the same..."
The Lord Giveth
Hold my hand, walk with me, Do you see that far off light? We're heading that direction And it's going to be a fight. There really isn't anything That you can possibly do, Besides being determined To pushing on and through. That glowing, warming light, Not as far away as it seems. I know you've seen it before In nearly all your dreams; Even heard it over screams, And felt it's heated beams, The battle to reach Heaven While tearing at the seams. That beautiful, joyous light, That perfect, loving place, Is really not unreachable, But it is a very difficult race. You'll surely have obstacles, Both surrounding and below, But the key is to ignore them While taking steps so slow. Your path starts to crumble, But don't falter, do not fret, You will positively stumble, But don't focus on regret. "Should I take another path, Or should I change my way?" Questions that are needed, but answered another day. Prayer, faith; good weapons, Both with powerful force, And can control the outcome While you stay your course. The invisible, evil entities, Will gnaw and bite nonstop, But the Lord will protect you, Pick you up when you drop. The darkness of the world, Surrounds you all the way, But together we'll destroy it, And under us it will stay. Remember to look ahead, And to leave it all behind, The grace of God be with you In both spirit and in mind. Jesus, answer our prayers, Healing worry, healing pain, We follow in sandy footsteps, For Your love is our gain.
You're So Sure
Confidence is "being sure," Simple people get confused, Arrogance is what they get, ... And they end up being used. They attract to all the idiots With this misdirected worth, And get caught up in bullshit Resulting in a new rebirth. "He was so perfect, so great, His confidence was vast. I simply do not understand Why love so quickly passed." I've watched these "people" Swallow so much of the shit, And then develop amnesia, And once again repeat it. Hey genius, he doesn't care About you as much as he, But by all means, continue, To be S-T-U-P-I-D.
Beautiful Madman
I stared into his eyes, Looked deeper within, I saw good deeds completed, ... And dark, bloody sin. His imperfections surfaced, A tear upon my cheek, I saw his ironclad strength, And times he was weak. His numerous mistakes, Moments of anger and pain,
Times he thought with heart And times ruled by brain. He's human, an animal, He's both living and dead, And I heard with such clarity All the things that he said. "Don't ever give up hope," "Know when to back down," All said through a smile, Doped up with a frown. He's happy, he's depressed, He's masked and undressed, He's damned, he is blessed, And never second-guessed. He is a beautiful madman, He's his own greatest fear, A very good, very bad man, And he's always right here. If I could shake his hand, I'd reach out for it now, But how does one shake One's own hand? Tell me... how?
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Act like a champion, Front like a beast, Lies are all you've got, To say the least. Act like you're happy, Front like you're glad, When the blind can see That you're truly sad. Act like you're honest, Front like you're real, With your lack of emotion, I wonder how you feel? Act like you're winning, Front like you've won, But you're actually losing, You're lost, you are done. Acting's for fakers, Fronts are just lies, To cover the truth Behind those dead eyes. Your blood, only pumping To keep you alive, So thick with the bullshit, How do you survive? So hold on to your act, Continue your front, The world already knows, You're a lying-ass... jerk.
Sometimes I Lay Awake
Sometimes I dream of you, Sometimes I lay awake, But consciousness is too real, And far too painful to take. It matters not, my friend, If eyes are open or sealed; Your being is always seen, There is no protective shield. It haunts me every moment, All-encompassing my life, From start, there is no finish, To the painful, fiery strife. This burning, this yearning, My stomach keeps churning, My thoughts keep turning Back to you, to me, to us, Brains infected like pus, What's the underlying, Eternally undying, Do I really keep lying, Sleepless nights, crying, Like I'm continuous flying Up towards the heavens, Only to crash and burn. I've crossed all the wires, So my brain will always take, To always dreaming of you, Sometimes I lay awake.
Friendship
Though I make bad choices, And make mistakes a lot, I'm so very, very thankful ... For all the friends I've got. You all hold special places In my tender, loving heart, Without every one of you, It would simply fall apart. You're all the foundation, The walls, roof, the whole, If any one of you were gone, I'd have an incomplete soul. When I met each of you, It was best time of my life. You know how to ease worry, To melt away the strife. I wish you were all here, To hold in a loving embrace, To kiss upon your cheek, To look upon your face. The warmth that rises out Of my life, comes from you, The happiness I am feeling, Nothing's been more true. I pray these words find you, And warm you up like flame. I'm so happy I know you all, And I'll never be the same. Even when I've faltered, You've all been there for me, Walking down the same path Even though not physically... But the power of my heart Put you right along my side, To hold me when I'm lonely, Dry my cheek when I cried. So, thank you all, my friends, You give purpose to my soul, You make life worth living, Without you, I'm not whole.
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You're not here, And that's okay, Because it was an awesome day. Would I enjoy it If you were here? I suppose I could, But the truth is now clear, That you're the reason For the awful nights, The agonizing days, The stupid, useless fights. You've moved on? Well, good for you. You say you're happy, That's just not true. You had your chances To enjoy this day, But you were selfish, And threw it away. I wish I were sad About the way, You've made things become, But it was an awesome day
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There was two frozen burritos, With a side of flaming hot Cheetos, I ate both things, And some chicken wings, And now I'm stuck on the toilet seat-o
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If only there was intelligence In anything that was said. If only it
would make sense, When it was heard or read. Speaking to your fellow man, You should attempt to be Grownup, if you even can, Be polite and use honesty. There really is only so much That I will allow you to
say. If you continue childishness Then there will come a day, When the color of my eyes Will turn from brown to red, And my anger levels will rise Past the height of my head. Bat wings will sprout out me
And fingernails turn to claws, Fangs will replace my teeth On dangerously strong jaws. I'll leap into the night sky, And swoop down viciously, Scooping you up, flying high, And jet off towards the sea. Over a stormy ocean wave, I'll shred you, body and soul, But act right and you'll save Yourself, not be eaten whole. Simple is the answer, friend, Show respect to everyone, Or you will see a bloody end, Doesn't that sound like fun?
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In a dense, wooded plane, Surrounded by the
wild, I call out to you, crying.
Screaming to stop the pain, My heart, so tender, so mild, I call out while I am dying.
But the visions in my brain, Making me feel like a child, And I know that you're lying.
But I push on like a train, Although you have beguiled Me
into this incessant crying.
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Dropped heavy, excruciating, Undeniably profound, Busted open eardrums, Sinister, psycho sounds. Terrible and wonderful, Exponentially perverse, Pouring out like dirty water, Across the universe. Distracting and intrusive, Disturbing and distraught, I try to plead for an end, Cautious, because it will not. Testing my inner boundaries Is what it always does, Nothing enters or escapes Gods made out of fuzz.
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Pull down the blinds, Draw the curtains, Life isn't like death, It's much less certain. What is the purpose? What is the reason? To every, single thing, There's surely a season. Cold, blistering wind, Harsh, pelting snow, Where can we all hide? Where's left to go? Nowhere but down, Humanity has finished, The fire consumes us, And life had diminished.
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Try appealing to the desire, Attempting to fuel the fire, But my efforts will fall short, And force-feed this empire. This kingdom of depression, This never-ending session, Ridiculously, I keep looking For answers to this question. But it's always the same one, The same bullet to this gun, Reloaded by another person, And impossible to outrun. I always get the opportunity, To
change all the faces I see, But eyes change into mirrors Again it's me looking at me. The gateway to my own soul, Never changes, black as coal, Darker every time they open, Sadness drips, they overflow. Tears of joy? Cry with glee? Why isn't it ever you I see? I try to turn around and flee, But trying is an absurdity. Because alone is where I sit, Upon this pile made of shit, Sinking down, up to my neck, Inhale, my lungs fill with it. You are close enough to hear The awful pain, horrid fear, Close enough you'll even see My eyes blink a final tear. And then some time flies by, And I emerge again to try, To fill that sad, empty space, With yet another loving eye. Rewind it all back to
the start Roughly fix my broken heart, To set it up just once more, So that, again, it falls apart.
Reanimated
Back once again, Back from the dead, Psychotic doors wide open, Inside your twisted head. Filling up your dreams, Consuming your thoughts, Splattered with screams, Making you see spots. Sanity levels depleting, Mental beasts begin feeding, All
your pureness receding, To the place it is meeting Up with my demons, To tell tales of your demise, The beasts eating your cries, Growing plump on your lies. Monsters from nowhere, Joining hands with your fate, Psychological fibers tear, Shredded by your hate. You've lost all control to sin, Your life is in my head, Because I'm back again, Back from the fucking dead.
Before The Sunrise
This blackish-blue blanket, Wrapped around the Earth, Coated with white diamonds, Inviting the sun's rebirth. A soothing, beautiful silence, A quiet, so warm and true, An almost spiritual feeling, To hear wind speak to you. Crickets so lightly chirping, The soft rustling of the trees, A sea of calming darkness, Split by only a cool breeze. Nature at it's most gorgeous, The purest form of all life, Peacefulness of nighttime, Free of all pain and strife. Crisp and clean, the smell, The stars twinkling up above, Sitting still you cannot help But feel all the Lord's love. Moments of this perfection, You just simply can't deny, Merely taking in this beauty, It's impossible not to cry.
Insomniac Attack
Awaken abruptly swimming, This substance isn't fluid, Splashing about in darkness,... Darkness ancient as a druid. I can sense the elder ruins, Encompassing my cold skin, All directions become one In this musty cave I am in. I close my eyelids tighter, Praying this is but a dream, I fill my lungs with dirty air, And try to muster a scream... But the dryness in my throat Halts any audible advance, I've sealed my eyes so tightly That I've entered a trance. Lost within my dark psyche, Miles away from civilization, A dreamlike state of reality, Of my own twisted creation. It only now begins to unravel Into coiled piles of clarity, With the sudden realization, Something's in here with me. Reaching towards the black, This creature holds my hand, Slowly the fear melts away, And both of us slowly stand. A dim glow begins encircling, Surrounding both our forms, It's silhouette takes shape, And the glowing light warms. As my eyes now finally fixate On the beast that I am with, I realize that it is simply me, Both of us upon a monolith. An altar of old igneous rock, In here for countless eons, Collecting souls like myself, Each sacrifice it's seen gone, Has stained the stone brown With dried blood and sweat, I close my eyes tight again, And try so hard to forget. It's only long after all of this, I awaken again in my bed, And after the sweat dries, I realize it's all in my head. The result of this nightmare, Is now abundantly clear, Insomnia is the only answer, For me to fully survive here.
Relapse
Deepest recess of your spirit, Darkest corner of your mind, Find the grave, do not fear it,.. Exhume the corpse you find. Reanimate what is now dead And again you give it breath, Pull pieces out of your head, Ignore all the laws of death. That which was dead inside, You'll give it another chance, To relive times when it cried, screamed, laughed, danced. That part of you you'd killed, And had buried deep within, It has been steadily refilled With rage to be used again. A limitless amount of hate, Never-ending internal pain, Fueling in it's dormant state, Building power for it's gain. So recreate this empty shell, A memory you've forgotten, That's been filled up by Hell, So dark, so evil and rotten. Just remember, keep control, When it's free of the chains, It can easily take your soul If don't remain the brains.
Write Midnight, Right Insight
It's the middle of the night, Insect noises filling the air, A cool breeze, feels just right And nothing can compare. It isn't completely silent, so My thoughts have company, They have a perfected flow, Then poems come out of me. The beauty of the nighttime, It's unmatched, all it's own, It is always the right time, To write down what's shown.
LOU
A thick and frightening mist, Cold and lightly falling rain, A clenched and bloody fist, Shaking after causing pain. Another name off of the list, Tally mark inside the brain, Obvious scars upon the wrist Upon the arm of the insane. This assassin's never missed, So much to lose and gain, Walk beside him, he'll insist, Before turning you to a stain. Your head bursts like a cyst, Your blood begins to drain, If you live, he will persist... Your soul.. he will obtain.
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Swirling fog and smoke, So thick it makes you choke, Lighting the night on fire, The pain of bones you broke. Coughing up dark splatter, Hearing those bones shatter, No one around that cares To ask, "Why does it matter?" Alone with all that pain, Filled with all that rage, A tear drips from your eye, And so you turn the page. The story will continue, Build more rage within you, And realize this loneliness Is all that's on the menu. Take heed that it will end, It just can't go on forever, Don't waste time preparing, You're simply not that clever.
Wings
Feathers snow upon you, Her wings are at full span, Arms wrapped around you, Embrace it while you can. Moments that you realize, She's directly at your side, See her endless, warm eyes, And memories she's cried. Her protection and comfort, Are always with you there, Easing pain, soothing hurt, All places, no matter where. Walk with the knowledge, The love you feel is true, However close to the edge, The angel walks with you.
Lou
Invisible to the naked eye, Hidden right in front of you, If you're on his list, you die, There's nothing you can do. His every, waking moment, He extinguishes life's flames, His anger sparks, like a flint, He has so many names... -«o»- Lou; the Schizophrenic Killer, The Sociopathic Psychotic, Mr. Malice, Splatter-pillar, Dr. Bloodlust I. Hypnotic. -«o»- You can't match his abilities, Malice's murderous talent, He's deaf to his victims pleas Death makes him so content. His unnatural body and face, Cartoony, dark and dreary, Here, gone, without a trace, An animated tornado of fury. Destructor of smiles and joy, Destroying what's held dear, His double guns are his toys, They'll play a game of fear. -«o»- He's cut, bony and skinny, Malnourished and dreadful, The voices, there's too many, An overflowing head-full. Years of arguing with no one, Made voices conversation, Each voice now has wily fun, And separate concentration. Lou's head is a kaleidoscope, Dozens of groups of chatter, All feeding each other hope, So a bullet does not shatter, Their twisted bone hospital, His mind, their inner den, All collected at the middle, And always ready to begin. -«o»- His silver .50 Desert Eagles, Named by the voices inside, Loki, Dead Queen, truly regal, And Ruiner, Killer of Pride. They're called The Insangels, Collecting souls for Mr. Grim, Serving deaths quite painful. Filling Hell up past the brim. Beautiful, silver flower petal, Expelling moonlight like fire, Other guns only scrap metal, No pair will ever get higher. -«o»- Tally marks carved into flesh, His kill count always there, Many notches, hours fresh, His endless eyes don't care. His connection to human life A memory that doesn't exist, Fueled by anger, pain, strife, Sealed in his scarred wrists. -«o»- You want to know Lou inside, Why he produces sadness? If he was ever happy, cried, Find a start to his madness? I don't know how to tell you, That your hope, a tiny speck, Lou has right now, but just to Fracture it's fucking neck. -«o»- There's no happy family part And then somebody's mean, No new opening in his heart, No "Previously on..." screen. No time he ever wore silk, No How I Met Your Mother, No, "We are all out of milk," Or, "Be nice to your brother." Those types of information, Don't exist for our pal, Lou, He simply is, and simply was This violent, vengeful brood. -«o»- Multiple murderer for cash, Then a few just for a kick, Several bodies, desert stash, Some that'd make you sick. "What is it, Lou? Feeling OK?" "No, damned head's ringing! Feels worse than yesterday, And who's kids are singing!" "Lou, bud, no child's around, You're starting to lose grip... King Crazy, you are crowned, Sailing on your Psycho Ship!" "Hilarious..," words like mud, Oozing out the front of Lou, Near instantly, I tasted blood And it was hours later, too. "What the hell is happening, My mouth is full of blood..." But no need for answering, Memories of words like mud. -«o»- I had lost lots of blood, I bet, Near one liter and one half, Vaguely, a jagged silhouette, Said, "Dying, do the math." "Idd-ont-uhndasted," I say, And I'm sure my jaw's broke, Clot in my nasal passageway, And then I begin to choke. I knew a psychological break Had occurred since the joke, Saying Lou's insane, mistake! Since in my blood, we'll soak! Unfortunately, the violence, That Mr. Malice has caused, Counteracts with the science, I can't say sorry; broken jaw! -«o»- "No need for any apologies," Lou said, being way to smiley. "We're all good, if you please We're feeling dark and wily!" He spun around, all the way, Until he faced me yet again, "Did you prepare for today?" And plastered on a grin... "What we call this," he held A straight razor, open wide, "Is endless hours of Hell, So let's see what is inside!" -«o»- He started up at my left ear, Pulling down over my neck, Onto my other side and clear Down over my right peck. Losing quite a bit of blood, Much faster than I should, Clotting? Not during a flood, Life-wise, this is no good. Lou took his razor blade, And went to the other ear, Mirrored cuts already made, Eyes void of any bit of fear. "Like tracing paper, so thin, Easier to cut than wood... Out of space, I'll start again, Openings are fucking good!" -«o»- He had bled me, all the way, Basically juiced me until dry, I didn't scream or cry, I say, No tears were in this eye. The Splatter-pillar's lost train That transported his sanity, Crashed inside of his brain, Not a survivor, I could see. My lifeless shell, torn open, Waiting to be rebuilt again, A doc-created blood ocean, Flowing out and flowing in... "I may be detached, a bit, Constantly fighting myself, But I still take no bullshit, and that's my endless wealth
From the Clouds
Another plane of existence That's parallel to this place; You must be otherworldly, With such a beautiful face. Whatever world created you, It couldn't possibly be here, No human looks this radiant, No one as sublime, my dear. Hair of a nonexistent color, A shade that has no name, Golden-brown like a desert, Glows as if kissed by a flame. Your eyes so unbelievable, Perfect in every, single way, Shines like sun-bathed water And can turn night into day. Your smile so light, superb, So bright, it's physically felt, Unheard levels of elegance, So much that my heart melt. You have to be from Heaven, I'll bet even the deities stare, At a perfect thing of beauty, You... nothing can compare. No word can fully describe The loveliness, unsurpassed, A true aesthetic perfection, Like the stars, endlessly vast. Just seeing you before me Can brings tears to my eyes, Gorgeousness unmeasurable At which even an angel cries. The energy surrounding you, Is what makes the day begin, The reason sunshine is warm Why it rises again and again. Though I'd gladly use my life Telling all about your grace, No words can describe the The true beauty of your face.
Speed-fueled, Patience dueled, With a disease of regret, The darker side, Times I've lied, Outcomes that are set. Up for days, In a haze, Don't care what I've done, Reality, Nothing to me, It seems like so much fun. Am I alive, Will I survive, Should I even care, In the mirror, Nothing but fear, All I do is stare. It is the end, For me my friend, But it will not consume, Hide away, The truth decay, And sink into your tomb.
A poem drawn by Ben Jackson. See his artwork page for more!
20/20
You can't help but hear the cries, And they still come as a surprise, Some young, some old, a twentyfold, The familiar pains that paralyze. Burn off the unwanted connections, But the sobbing has a resurrection, Born again, sad grin, two times ten, There's no cure for this infection. So you bury your broken form alive, Hoping your strength will still thrive, Untrue, you unglue, ten times two, The weeping is all that will survive.
•:10·14·14·10·51:•
It's far from this place,
I know for sure that's true,
But distance? Which direction?
I have absolutely no clue...
I've thought about exploring,
Of checking around every turn,
I've toyed with possibly dying,
Being maimed, drowned or burned...
Because I truly have no idea,
What waits inside the void,
But know if I don't find what I need,
I will surely be destroyed.
It may even be imaginary,
Might not even be something real...
I only have this tiny glimmering hope,
That it's true, this thing I feel.
I BELIEVE that it is out there,
Just waiting patiently to be found,
And I BELIEVE that it is calling me,
To a much, much higher ground.
I actually did not realize, until now,
That I've been searching since birth,
To find this "buried treasure",
And what it is really worth.
So this may be the final time
You'll ever hear from me,
Because if I can't find my happiness,
I will just simply cease to be...
Looking through eyes, seeing the dead, Shadows and darkness, all in your head, Feeding the frenzy, the frenzied are fed, Trust in her lies so that you may be misled. Love? Nonexistent. Warmth? It's ice cold,... A hatred so deep, it's to have and to hold, Sell me your spirit, your soul has been sold, Trust in her lies, since that is all she's told. Claw out your eyes, you've no need to look, Tremble with anger, the rage has you shook, The fires of Hell brings a smell while you cook, Trust in her lies, innocence that she took. Don't fall apart; stand strong and stand tall, Stopping your heart; tear a ventricular wall, Back to the start; this time give it your all, Trust in her lies, so once again, you may fall.
Untitled
Oh silence, to be golden, A trait I won't possess. My mind, it's total opposite, Filled with heaps of stress. Unnerving and upsetting, Endless, like miles of twine, A knotted length of voices, None of which are mine. A memory of things to come, Of happenings not passed, And visions of relationships That were not meant to last. Friendship with a rivalry, Paired like black and blue, Leaves bruises on my sanity And falsely rings so true. If I close my eyes up tightly, And focus on the scars, I almost feel a healing heat Like fire from the stars. Although you are not here, And never will that be true, You are strangely with me And always will be, too. The memories like bullets, My brain, a loaded gun, And the clip is never empty, A pain I can't outrun. Even when I pass away I know it will not stop, I sow the seeds I've planted, A poisoned, rotten crop.
Armageddon
A blistering, scorching wind, Upon the angel's wings, Tells tales of the battles... Fought between the Kings. One, the Throne of Fire, A castle built from sin, Agonizing hate and death That's burning from within. The monstrosities that cry Out angry words in harmony Are singing dark delights to This demon that they see. Up on high, the beautiful, The Throne of King of Kings, Whilst angels sing
out praises Of the glory that He brings. The brilliance, oh, the joy, The overwhelming love, Rains down upon the Earth A flood comes from above. This always ceaseless war, These never-ending fights, Are taking place around us, Through the days and nights. The end draws ever closer, The trumpets sounding out, A side must now be chosen, Time to eliminate the doubt.
Where Are You?
Upward and downward, Inside and outward, Back, forth, that way, this, Every which way, My mind will still sway, But on point, will never miss. Scattered, blood-spattered, Like glass shards, shattered,
In pieces, but still a whole, To myself, much pleading,
Incomprehensible reading, Words carved into my soul. Insane and implausible, Unreal and intangible, Thinking as a schizophrenic, Closed eyes, not sleeping, Smiling whilst weeping, A calmness covered in panic. Continuously crazy, Psychologically hazy, Reality is but a phrase, Dreamlike consciousness, What do I want with this Psychosis, brain like a maze. I see no end result, My thoughts catapult, Over walls built of confusion, Because the end is not there On levels we don't share, For the sanity is an illusion. We aren't of the same plane Of existence that's sane, On a level that's all my own, Be afraid of my living, Take the chance I am giving To avoid a world I've shown. You do not understand, And will not demand, To take a piece of my mind. Stay where you've been And don't travel within Places that house my kind.
Dusk
Blackness covers the sky Like a
vampire's cloak, And the stars razor-light Pierce your vision Like bullets from heaven. The time is short, And the daytime is long, But night holds beauty That cannot be denied.
Knuckles & Bone
Step back, watch yourself, Watch it all fall down. Pivot on your feet and walk, Don't even try it, clown. A peaceful type of enemy, The one you least suspect. With miles of crazy energy , Your face will get wrecked. I'm too far past childishness And don't have time for this, If you want some problems I'll give you your wish. I'm friendly and
big-hearted, I'm loving and I'm chill, But check yourself, friend,
Because I'm king of this hill. The rage that I have pushed Down for all these years Can erupt if it is necessary And can cause endless tears. So, please, don't even try Flexing yourself at me, I was born covered in blood And I can leave that way, G.
Son with the Son
Only a year has passed, And it seems forever, Seems only minutes ago, When that bond did sever. I never got to know you, Or to hear your voice, And although there is pain, It was our Lord's choice. You're waiting in Heaven, Surrounded by much joy, I can't wait to hold you, My beautiful baby boy. I love you more than life, And need to see your
face, But I know it's far away, And in a better place. I can't describe my anger, Sadness can't be defined, The light that you shine Will be always in my mind. One day we'll be together, A connection will
complete, Our hearts will be as one, When we finally meet. So hear me, oh my God, And keep Elijah near, Hold him in your arms, Hold him oh so dear. As I lay awake tonight, Dreaming without sleep, Know that I do love you, son, Even whilst I weep.
Supernova Slumber
Stars, bright and many, Speckling the skies, Burning in the heavens, Like billions of tiny eyes. They stare right through you, They glare right through you, Flaming celestial retinas, They tear right through you.
Fires of the endless skies, Like fires from below, Those billions of tiny eyes See inside, and they know. Those infinite, blazing suns, This
collection of hot lights, Will one day be snuffed out; Stop their heavenly flights. Oh, to be a beautiful star, To be an explosive sun, To end in a fiery blaze, Like a bullet from a gun. The end draws ever closer,
When light will be no more, And waves no longer crash, Ever again, upon a shore. The wind won't blow at all, And no setting/rising sun, A peaceful, calming end, When all will become one.
GRIM
Deadly times we're living in, We often feel like giving in. Knee-deep in sin, Where to begin, Time to reevaluate again. What's the cause of the pain And evil images in the brain, Like a bullet train,... The speed we're slain, Death is life, it is insane. I don't know how to rebuild, The innocence was all killed. Minds were filled, Bones were chilled, Poison soil has been tilled. So redirect your eyes to Him, And light back up from dim, Wool we will trim, Love refills to the brim, And can change a world... that's GRIM.
I'm Sick
I feel like I'm dying. I can't breathe in, I can't stop coughing,... I can only begin. I'm hot and sweaty, My brain is spaghetti, My lungs are raw, Painful and heavy. I was just sick! Really? Again?! Oh God, why is this Happening to Ben? I soon will collapse, Sickness will relapse, My heart barely beating, Those very faint taps. I will die from a cough, I'll hack until dead, Until spilling out of me, Just dark, crimson red.
Untitled, 4
Although you are not here, I feel your warm embrace, And even with eyes shut, I can clearly see your face. You're always in my dreams, When sleeping and awake, I'm thinking of you always, And love that we will
make. Beauty knows no bounds, Happiness has no end, You're my life, my partner, My everything, my friend. These words are all for you, So take me by the hand, I love you and adore you, Together we will stand. My heart belongs to you, My happiness and smiles, Our joyfulness is blinding, It can be seen for miles. The envy of the angels, Is the love
you and I share, We have a bond so perfect, That nothing can compare. I wish that you were here, Sitting right next to me, But I still feel your presence And always will, you see. Because you're in my soul, You'll always be around, And everyone is jealous Of this great love I've found.
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You're always on the go, Busy doesn't even begin, Miss you every moment, And then miss you again. I only want a
connection, A circuit to be complete, But you are never there, It feels like constant defeat. A spoken word or two, A briefly held conversation, Something that's this simple Would ease my frustration. It's a nauseous feeling, That begins within my heart, Without you as foundation, I'm starting to fall apart. I should count my blessings, And thank God I am alive, But without you in my life, I don't even want to survive. Tears flow out like rivers, Sobbing, I gasp for air, Unhappiness continuous, Because you're never there. I'll keep waiting for you, As patient as I can be, But it all feels for naught, I wish that you could see.
Bore Through Bone
Open your eyes, Close your mouth, Look; don't say a word, A bird that flies Towards the South, Is better seen, not heard. You've no information, You've nothing new, It's time to learn, not teach. You're an old creation,
Version one, not two, A limit you already reach. You foolishly follow, You stupidly stand, In back of all the rest, Your head is hollow, Nothing in your hand, You'll fail every test.
Unimportant stereotype, Uncreative mass of mud, Skin color, race, religion, Teeth, hair, skin and blood. Melted, boring snowflake,
River of icy, rushing juices, Draining into nothingness, Breaking all your truces. You're just a cancerous lump Of flesh, hunched and loose, Die, end, rot, cease to live, Create this final truce
Untitled 4.1.13
I'm a walking nothingness, A living, breathing thought, A dream inside a nightmare, You think I'm more, I'm not. Don't fret about my feelings, Simply do not show concern, If I was engulfed in flames, You needn't worry if I burn. Invisible, untrue, a blank, A monster under the bed, Am I happy? Do I have joy? Just
put it out of your head. You've got a full schedule, You've many things to do. Why waste your time on me, If I can give nothing to you? So don't you worry about me And go on about your day. Soon I won't even exist... ... no longer be in your way.
Untitled 4.5.13
Truth be told, I'd be so bold, To tell you how you seem. If even one, knew what you'd done, It'd make them scream. I hold it inside, The times you lied, The terrible way you treated, I'd never tell, Of your inner hell, Because you'd be defeated. A second chance, To restart this dance, And this time let you lead, But don't repeat, Don't walk the same street, And we'll replant the seed. Love is there, If you still care, And we can make it work. But tread very light, And we'll win this fight, Where these demons lurk
Untitled
I can see you clearly, I long to hold you dearly, My arms are open wide, Within them, you can hide.
But then the screams begin.
Happiness is surrounding, Joyous songs are sounding, Beauty shining brightly, Both daily and nightly.
But the truth, truly burning, Eyes bloody and yearning, Tearing through my brain, And driving me insane.
Our never-ending smiles, Can be seen for miles, The envy of the world, As our love is unfurled.
Then I wake up crying.
Truth is, you're not mine, And no friends, I'm not fine, My heart is broken in two, And there is no such glue. My soul is black and blue, The lies have become true, This noose is tied to you, And I know not what to do.
The end? Not close enough. It can't really be this tough. Try to sink into a deep sleep, But I quickly start to weep...
...then I wake up crying... ...my soul is slowly dying... ...I need to stop the strife...
...welcome to my life.
Reality Finality
I asked for an answer, To a question of worth, And the response received, Brought me back to my birth. If I had known this outcome, Before I'd been conceived, I'd have stopped my heart, So none would have grieved. This depression is so vast, This sadness is so extreme, Though I search for a light, Nonexistent, it would seem. To hear that the person to Whom you gave your heart, Has no place for your love, Well...simply tears you apart. Spirit and mind destroyed, Heart and soul torn down, If exists a King of Heartache Then you give me the crown. My insides are so empty, My entirety, darkly drained, My full being is completely And viciously bloodstained. I'm done, I'm truly finished, I've nowhere else to be, The person I'm in love with, Wants nothing... to do... with me.
Grounded
You seem stuck in a rut? Is your outcome so unclear? What is it you desire? What is it that you fear? These problems all around Can be wiped away today, And you can truly be happy, All you need to do is pray. He's waiting for your will, His hand open to take. The meaning of the phrase, "Oh, for Heaven's sake," Is truly a simple answer, An easier path than this, But all the opportunities, Are close to being missed. Ride that fence no longer, And quickly pick a side, Our time here is so scarce, Time to
put away your pride. The Lord has only love, And wants to share with you, That tenderness is real, 'Cause my heart feels it, too. I have only ever wanted To show you all that joy, To share this endless love, With you, her and our boy. There needn't be the rage, The fighting, or the hate. My arms are always open, Even though it pains to
wait. Although there's been hurt, There's always room to heal, And I promise you that God, His love, and mercy are real. He's now filling in
the blanks Of what I didn't understand, And I've realized my faults, I'm ready to make a stand. The Almighty has a place, For all, for you and me, We've only to open our eyes And we will clearly see, That all the misplaced anger, All the animosity and pain, Can almost instantly fade, And so much we will gain. We may never be together, We might always live as two, But if we never become one, I still have
that love for you. I wish you nothing more, Than a fruitful, happy life. I'll need you as a friend, Even if you're not my wife. Jesus, heal us both, my Lord, Protect us and help us grow. Without having Your love, There's nothing left to know. Though our lives be separate And this match is not to be, I pray to God you find Him, And in turn, maybe find me.
Vampire Bats
The heavy darkness that's Under each of my eyes Like sleeping vampire bats, Is unfortunately no surprise. Sleepless hours at best, Neigh, not hours but days, And I've attempted to rest In so many different ways, That
I've lost all connection To what is called "reality", And the continuous infection Of what's not there I can see. Hallucinations, dark vision, Of the impossible dream, Endless hours of television, "If my retinas could scream," They'd yell out your name In a blood-curdling shriek, They'd curse audible flame For a straight, restless week. My head is now overflowing With a dense, lifeless cloud. I'll surely fade away knowing Silence that's painfully loud. Ear-blistering nothingness, Earth-shattering quiet, Can't believe it's come to this Internal, cerebral riot. It's been built so badly, It's ready to crumble and fall Into psychosis, so sadly, But I truly gave it my all. "Ring-Ring," your alarm said, It's time to wake up and rise, The vampire bats are dead, Unfortunately, no surprise.
Light Your Way
When God created this land, He said, "Let there be light," And darkness held it's hand, Wrong came along with right. Bright and happy instances Exist with
every, lovely day, But there's dark influences That can often be in the way. The trick is to pay attention, Don't ignore it, it is there. Hold on to good intentions, Be sure to show you care. Darkness wrapped in pain Will try to make you fail, Just use love so you maintain Happiness when you set sail. Be sure to fully understand, Who is truly helping you out, Who is lending you a hand, And walking the right route. Some will try to lead you Down a crooked, evil slide, They attempt to impede you, They've cheated, stolen, lied. If you find it hard
to realize Who is there only to destroy, The Lord will open your eyes And reveal their evil ploy. So turn your eyes upon Him, And open up your heart, The path need not be dim, Now's a perfect time to start.
Sixteen Bits
Dangerous machinery, for an Unpredictable hour, Biotechnical instability, with ... Schizophrenic power. Twisting, turning tables, with Extraterrestrial sound, and Persistently aggressive noise Is violently circling around. Systematic insanity that Gradually increases, and Over time, destroys ears by Dismantling the pieces
Untitled 5.27.13
Mindless, endless traveling, Walking through
the blood, We have left a world bereft Of oxygen, replaced by mud.
Sinking down, to the frown, All the while we're crying, Left alone, skin and bone, Out of breath and dying. Beads of sweat, soaking wet, Dripping from our face, Hot as hell, bruises swell, In this terribly ugly place. Take His hand, to the sand, Out of the muck and mire, Rising
up, drink from the cup And climb out of the fire
Untitled 5.30.13
Heartlessness is real, Although hard to believe. Insane some are so selfish, And so willing to deceive. What has happened to us? Are some truly this dark? Using others is to them As blood is to a shark. Predators of happiness, Destroyers of
good things, Hiding amongst the humans, Demons with angel wings. Pretending to have feelings, Acting as if they care, Simply to absorb your life Anytime and everywhere. But I can see right through Their false and plastic smile, Due to the undeniable scent Of evil, putrid and vile. The light shows their nature, Dark can't hide the truth, The end will be here swiftly, Paid as a tooth for a tooth.
Beyond The Heavens
Here amongst the moonlight, Peering at the
many stars, Trillions of fiery diamonds, Shining at me from afar. Infinitely vast and wide, Forever deeper into space, Of the endless possibilities, I've found you in this place. Even in the night's darkness, The light you shine is seen, The warmth surrounding you Is so pure, so crisp, so clean. The happiness you've given, Encompassing my heart, Not a thing will stop it's flow, Nor tear this bond apart. I truly had never realized, Until when I saw your face, That there was so much love, Wrapped in your embrace. I'll hold you until the end, And keep you in my soul, Not even having all the stars, Can make me feel so whole. This never-ending joyfulness Is the meaning of sublime, And I'll hold you in my arms, Until the very end of time.
Together
The smile that I'm wearing, The joy that I have found,
The happiness I'm sharing, Is spreading all around. The sun is so much brighter, The air is crisp and true, Everything's so much lighter,
Since the day that I met you. You've shown me how to be Happy every single day, Brought vast cheer to me, I pray you're here to stay. My life completed with you, My heart so full of love, That everything feels new, And the heavens sing above. Take my hand and join me, As we travel on angels wings, Together we are always free, No matter what life brings.
Untitled 6.18.13
The day almost over, The sun is fast asleep, Some people are smiling, While others deeply weep. For those of you in the latter, The sun will shine again, Although it seems forever, the light will soon shine in. I know the darkness builds, And seems it will not end, But do always remember, In me, you have a friend. So although you are crying, And the pain is everywhere, I promise it gets better, And I promise I always care
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Terrible black, The sky is corrupt, Flashes of sadness, Direct and abrupt. Like tornado conditions, Extreme heat into cold, Ebony clouds swirling, In directions untold. Then the fear will unfold, Exploration so bold, To enter this fog, Without a hand to hold. Life's an adventure, And there's so many
routes, Which way should you shoot, Who you shouldn't salute. Who deserves your respect, Who should you avoid, Which places you've enjoyed Who you've annoyed... Exit strategy for living: Steer clear of the dark, That festering spark, Swishing around like a shark. Ready to light the fuse, Of anger that we use, Your thoughts wildly
swaying Like they're coated in booze. Insanity is a substance, We've all been high on, So be a king or a queen, And no longer be a pawn
Untitled, 7/21/13
He traveled from nowhere, Appeared out of the dark, The only light that is there, Is a depressive, angry spark. He used to shine brilliantly, And light up his path alone, But one tried so diligently, To extinguish light he shown. No reason for hurtfulness, No purpose behind the hate, This anger in it's wholeness, Is massive; endlessly great. All he had done was feel, Let some frailty shine down, Open up to show he was real And only received a frown. The heartless, evil populace, The natives in this new place Stole the light from his fist, And spit hatred on his face. Tearing down his tenderness And laughing at his pain, They could not handle this, So caused excessive strain. Until the emotional weight Had broke his mind apart, His spirit in an injured state, And a useless, broken heart. You ask, "Why'd they do this, Destroying someone good? When the joy they now miss, Could have been so good?" Now unanswered questions, As he disappears yet again, If they'd only put the best in, True happiness could begin.
Truth Be Told
Wondering why there's hate? Curious to why there's rage? Humans are deteriorating, We're in
our final stage. The populace is greedy, Our race is so distraught. Selfish, stupid creatures, Ignoring what we're taught. Every, single one of us, Knows both right and wrong, But many choose weakness, Over
being internally strong. It's so obviously easier, To be a wretched fool, To ignorantly walk about, Like an unlearned tool. I'd rather be the sunshine, To share, to give, to smile, Even without that much, I'll gladly go that extra mile. I haven't much to share, And even less to spare, but Generosity is always there, And I'll always truly care. What do you need, friend? If I have it, it's all for you. We can reverse the damage, If we all start being true. The light is always there, We need only open our eyes, And walk forward together, Towards a new sunrise.
Round One
All you moronic, stupid apes, Flexing, thinking you're bad, You aren't
coming off tough, But more ridiculous and sad. Nobody is standing in awe. No one cares if you can fight. Watching you swinging dick, Is a really pathetic sight. I'm laid back to a crazy level, More chill than a polar bear, And seeing you try to strut? I REALLY will NEVER care. You'll never be threatening, You strike absolutely no fear, But before
you get all "huffy" Let me be perfectly clear; I'm not giving a challenge, To show me you're hardcore, So save your idiotic breath, Because it really is a bore. I'm nonviolent and peaceful, My fists have no need to fly, I've no desire to battle you, So don't even freaking try. Everybody has a dark side, We all have that inner fight, Mine has remained dormant And has never seen a light. I've never found the need, To ever use my endless rage, That vicious, snarling beast, Has always been in a cage. I guess what it is I'm saying, Is to put away your "guns", You'll never fill me with fear, And you're not a threat, son. Try using your tiny brain, Instead of your stupid fists, Just do the world a big favor, And cut both of your wrists.
Insomnia
It's become a normality, but Not exactly a normal thing, Suffering through the night, Obsession is what it'll bring. Misery truly loves company, Not to be split personalities. Insofar, it's working, though, As many sleeping casualties.
Untitled 8.27.13
Poetic, Artistic Insanity, Rare, The title here is everywhere, More than one, on to share, One plus one, that's a PAIR. * * * * Tripped on my own two feet, Stumbled on my dreams, Thoughts clouded by myself, Only hearing my screams. Something holding tightly, My brain locked into place, Am I here... on this Earth? No, I'm flying through space. Skidding past endless stars, Like never-ending bugs, Passing by versions of me, Getting nothing but shrugs. "Why you think you're here, Flying fast past yourselves?" Because I'm needing to meet The me's I've put on shelves. All of me is scattered pieces, I've not been whole forever, And I need more knowledge, To heal all that I've severed. Eventually, I'll become one, I'll be Ben without despair, When that is, I do not know, And nothing will compare. When all of me can coexist, As one, and not in pieces, My supernova of a talent Will show how it increases. When I am pushing full-on, And there's nothing but flow,
It will be truly unbelievable, More than you'll ever know. So, I say, prepare yourself, For the day is very neigh, And I'll explode, a firework, So damn beautiful, you'll cry. See me struggle, scrambling, To put the puzzle together... And my insides will all float Down softly, like a feather. Resting upon a blank page, Like ink spattered on paper, Suddenly dropping like lead, Without the slowing taper. I feel nothing but my peace, Just existing in this trance,
Standing tall, I will not fall, I'll get that second chance. It's continuous, this wording, As poring out a spilling glass, Stay with me, hold my hand, Eventually it will all pass. So, be ready... for the end, Is just around the crazy bend, Ghostly messengers do send Directly to all you, my friend.
Shadow Beast
Stepped in a Shadow, Splashed on my throat, Quickly wiped it away, But I think I should note... It's slowly been spreading, Down past my chest, Engulfed all my limbs, It just will not rest. All that is left of me, Not covered in the black, Is my disappearing face, The Shadow's next attack. It has almost consumed me, I'm becoming the dark, And soon I'll be swimming In the night, just like a shark.
Shadow Beast, Shadow Beast Eating me alive... Shadow Beast, Shadow Beast I will not survive... Shadow Beast, Shadow Beast Why have you chosen me? Filthy, ugly Shadow Beast What do you want from me?
Although I still look the same Inside my frightened eyes, I've very little time left, Before I'm the Beast's prize. Swallowing my entire body, Swallowing me whole, Feeding on my inner fears, Feeding on my soul. Have you seen this creature? Have you heard it's name? Dark, Devil, Shadow Beast, They're all one in the same. So stay out of the darkness, Each shadow is it's domain, It'll destroy your whole life, And it'll drive you insane.
Shadow Beast, Shadow Beast Eating you alive... Shadow Beast, Shadow Beast You will not survive... Shadow Beast, Shadow Beast I'm now completely gone... Horrid, evil Shadow Beast Just another pawn...
Untitled 10.17.13
Ripped through the air, Split the midnight sky, A flash through your eye, Knocked down trying to fly. Fight back against the tear,... Attack with all your might, Trample the wrong tonight, Backed by what is right. Strength you needn't share, The power held within, You've truly only to begin, To release it all again. Shred the pain and despair, Disconnect it from it's power, Battling it hour after hour, From above rage will shower. It cannot withstand the light, So shine yours evermore, Blasting from your core, Seen at every, single shore. An endless, powerful flight, From the never-ending stars, From here to moons of Mars, The things your fire chars. Seeing without actual sight, Through what isn't real, The outer layer will peel, Exposing what you feel. You'll offer up what's right, And take down the injustice, Take heed, do not rush this, Forever know what trust is
LOU III
Several, tiny, padded cells, Within each, a different face, Each one alone, all it's own, And each one has it's place. -«o»- Wide-eyed, staring blankly, At walls that do not move, Slow sinking, never blinking, Like he's something to prove. Pupils so dry they're bloody, Each iris is changing shape,
Skin so pale, mouth is stale, No tongue and left agape. Forever in a comatose state, Can't define the infinite fear, No way out, can never shout, About the fright felt in here. -«o»-
Whirlwind of festering anger, His lips bitten right through, Boiling blood, thick as mud, Brains heated into a stew. So full of rage, he's sobbing, The tears sizzling on his skin, Fists so tight, knuckles
white, Masked with a bloody grin. Directionless with his hatred, No purpose for being pissed, Swing at air, a crimson stare, Into the black heart's abyss. -«o»- Fully submerged in self-pity, A dark and deep depression, Empty tears, for 1000 years,
A sea filled by aggression. Hopeless, he lies defeated, Freshly-sliced wrists oozing, Forty days, a sleepless haze, His eyes with heavy bruising. No matter, levels of misery, Or how much pain he'll feel, It is done, no noose or gun, In here, it's simply not real. -«o»-
Suicide holds no reasoning, In here, Death doesn't exist, Want to die? Useless to try, The reason why, you missed.
These grim and ghastly tales, And no this isn't some game, Describing, see, all the three, Are actually one in the same. Each cell described, in turn, A personality of one being. Levels, you see, of insanity,
But only some you're seeing. The person we're describing, Singular "person" is just lies, He's distraught, mind is shot, Since he's closer to ten guys. -«o»- Now this chance has ceased, To give you more to know, Time's not right, not tonight, But there is more to show. Seven more personalities, Seven more to go through...
Once described in full... May God have mercy on Your soul..... Because then, you'll know the ten disturbed sides.... of LOU.
Insanity
Insanity, a drug to me,
Addicted, out of control,
I need a hit, this crazy shit,
Has latched on to my soul.
Funny, too, the dealer who
Keeps me on this high...
Is it you? No... guess who?
It's Me, Myself and I!!!
Crazytime! Another rhyme,
Pouring out of my brain...
I cannot quit, this crazy shit,
Because I am INSANE!!!
On the Shores
The smell of burning flowers, Singed grass and fiery bark, A scent heavy in my nostrils, This firestorm leaves a mark. Plumes of thick, black smoke Trailing miles into the sky, Reaching far past my vision, Too far for the human eye.... Slipping past charred piles Of flame-kissed, dying trees, At the center of destruction, I slump down to my knees... Once a mighty, quiet woods, Now a scene of smoky death, A split into the burning crust, Sulfur inhaled in my breath. The spirits rising from within, The dead marching like ants, Pouring out like dirty water, Spitting forth demonic rants. Thousands of damned souls, Prepare themselves for war, It's then I hear the eagle cry, Above this, Hell's evil shore. I lift my head, gazing upward Towards the ash-filled sky, The awesomeness I witness, Causes me to joyfully cry... Angels wielding white light, Weapons crafted of the sun, Are diving fast at the surface Knowing the battle's begun. Crashing down with a force That shakes the entire Earth, With power that only comes From the strength of rebirth. Slashing through rotten flesh Destroying the unholy horde, Calling out, with every blow, "In the Name of the Lord!" Demons cast back to the Pit, Squealing out in horrid pain, And in a flash, it is all gone, And I'm standing in the rain. I peer down the rugged cliff, That I had reluctantly found, The choice I had to die here, Ended on the wrong ground. The epic battle that happend Had been waged internally, And when I opened my eyes, I could finally and truly see. I left this ledge here today, Thoughts of suicide no more, I turned back toward a light, To Heaven's glorious shore.
Thick as Mud
Pick the meat off the bones,
Scratch off all the fleas,
No matter what you try to do
There still remains disease.
You cannot heal or cure it,
It rots us all from within,
Not bacteria, not a virus,
It's a sickness known as sin.
Make decisions as you like,
Believe whatever you may,
But when all starts burning,
Don't bother trying to say,
That you had no knowledge,
That you really had no clue,
When several have spoken,
What they believe is true.
Opportunities are abound,
Every single way you look,
To either walk a new path,
Or follow the one you took.
But if you're given choices,
To move towards the light,
Don't ask me for sympathy,
While knowing what is right,
When the crashing begins,
Your options will disappear,
You'll be left, so damn bereft
Of what was already clear.
Here's another chance now,
A moment for you to seize,
To find an almighty antidote,
To this incurable disease.
5/11/14
There's billions here today, And billions from the past, Countless not even here yet, Not even quite near the last. But even if they're infinite, No matter, just pay no mind, The definition of perfection, Is MY Mother, you will find.... Not one that is as beautiful, Not a single soul so sweet, If she wasn't here on Earth, NO ONE would be complete! Her love is so unconditional, A voice as beautiful as she, Eyes that bring you comfort, And make you feel free. To all Mothers on this day, I celebrate endless worths, Hugs, healing, drying tears, And surviving all our births. You're someone's everything, There's so much love for you, But no matter, pay no mind, MY Mother's best, it's true!!!!
I love you, MOM!!!!! Forever and a day!!!!!
-«:MIÐNIGHT INT€RNÅL:»-
Moonlight brightly shimmers, Crisp ivory and electric blue, Painted on the nighttime sky, So vibrant, so bold, so true. The midnight hour's beauty, Is impossible for one to deny, Let it's energy surround you, And you cannot help but cry. The peacefulness, the calm, Relaxation of it's purest form, Whether Summer or Winter, If the air is chilled or warm, It's amazing when you realize That merely a time of the day, Can fill you up with emotion, And make you feel this way...
...and you've too much to do, You haven't the time to see, To take in your surroundings, To expirence something free. You need to make the time, This chance may be your last, Is this your final opportunity? Has every moment passed?
...simply slow yourself down, Try taking in something real, There may be no other time For your soul to TRULY feel.
Untitled 9.9.14
Open your eyes! Don't be surprised! There's truly nothing that exists, In any form, that makes you warm, You can't find inside you're wrists.
Repetitious, delicious and vicious, A suicidal title, so superstitious, Bleeding, overeating and feeding, Skull with a hole, everyone's needing. ... Blank? Black? Shadows of white? Sun casts in the middle of the night. Rotten, forgotten, even begotten, The youth will weep upon mere sight.
So open your eyes! Absorb the lies! There is no one to make you smile, Hard to believe, that they all deceive, But the human instinct is so vile.
Is there even a number to fit?
The sunsets or sunrises we get?
Infinite days, one endless night,
A simple embrace, a reason to fight.
I'd tear down every inch of the world,
Searching for that one place...
Just that one hidden place...
Why am I looking for it in this world?
I already knew, chose not to believe,
That it is a place that I never leave,
Looking for it with my own two eyes,
And it's in my heart, it's no surprise.
The irony, the sheer levels of irony,
Matched in numbers by frustration,
And walls made of condemnation,
I'll tear them down...
I'll tear them down with the world,
Because all my power just unfurled,
Determination of the terminations,
Of ridiculous, problematic creations,
With all my strengths full inflation...
Inflated by what, they say...
and they try to look down on me...
And I sew their eyes shut by string,
Rip out tongues so they say nothing,
Now left in darkness without a voice,
And it would never have happened...